grimmdark | Four knitted scarves

916 Bilko Boulevard, Accidental Phonecall. Unfiltered. Open to housemates

*the phone picks up mid-conversation, as if it's been knocked off the hook by clumsy teenagers Rose's voice comes from not too far.*

I still cannot believe we are doing this. Enjoyable as it might be, I must admit I still have some reservations about it.

Rose, I assure you your reservations are wholly misplaced. I have done this many, many times before, and it has ...almost always resulted in the full enjoyment of all involved parties.

*Rose scoffs a little, but wait, was that a hint of a giggle underneat?* I will give that much to you; you are quite skilled with your hands. I stand here jealous at this discovery...this is really nice though.

*There's the sound of shifting, and Kanaya almost sounds as though she has something in her mouth when she speaks next.* Sweeps of practice have rendered my digital manipulators quite dextrous, yes - and I'm quite pleased to hear that you're finding this to your liking. But as promised, no word of this liason shall ever pass my lips.

If I may ask you to hold as still as possible, Rose? This next part will be rather tight.

While I graciously accepted your request to lend myself to your ways, I must admit I haven't grown to like the fact you are handling me like a rag do-

*Rose's complain is cut as she gasps, and then speaks in a rather mortified tone*

That is...rather tight. My back will be reminding me of this with unforgiving soreness later

*And for her part, Kanaya does sound very apologetic.* I'm quite sorry, but I believe it's for the best to handle the worst of the discomfort at the beginning. I give the full weight of my word that it will be exponentially more agreeable - even satisfying - from this point on.

But please continue to hold still. I would feel very displeased with myself were I to inadvertently scratch you.

So you say. Perhaps it's because you are doing all the work. I feel as if I should probably take the matter into my own hands, but then that would mean you would be but an spectator. Either way one of us is left to watch.

*Rose's tone takes a degree of amusement*A scratch? Not for a lack of effort. I've been holding my breath at every "Hold Still" by now.

I would really rather engage with you directly than to be a mere observer of this flourishing radiance and beauty alike. It simply wouldn't be suitable. And besides, you're certainly a participant rather than a spectator, even if it's a far more passive role than you might prefer. I'm afraid I can't allow you to domineer our interactions every time.

But only a little further, and-- *And then there's a surprised intake of air as somebody notices the displaced phone and moves to hang up. Oops.*

*Somebody hasn't seen the phone yet*

Kanaya? Kanaya Mayram, don't you dare leaving me here without taking proper care of my clothes-

*And so ends the rather strange call*

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

*And Kanaya makes a strangely strangled noise.* I--

That's not--

There isn't--

Feferi, I assure you you are gravely misunderstanding the situation.

Kanaya. It doesn't take a dozen eyes to see that you two have been flushed for each other for a while now. At least since Hiveapproaching, if not before.

Honestly, I'm happy for you two. I'm really happy. I told Rose this, but it doesn't matter that you're a troll and she's a human. If you make each other happy, what else matters?

*Somebody is terribly green-faced over here.* I can't say for certain where you've been receiving your information, Feferi, but I can promise you that you are certainly well wide of the mark in your guessing, and that I consider Rose Lalonde far too vexing to ever consider developing flushed inclinations in her direction. And she is a human, and despite your words that would be weird.

...I didn't get it from anywhere other than seeing how you two interact. It's a dead ringer for matespritship only with - and no offense to Rose - a flighty broad involved.

...besides, stranger things have happened around this fishbowl.

She is an exceptionally flighty broad, only she isn't all the time, or even a plurality of the time other than the moments which would certainly suffice as flightiness.

But that is irrelevant and once again I must insist that any perception of feelings to that end on either one of our parts must certainly be a misinterpretation of events. And events at Hiveapproaching were only due to sufficient duress and the liberal application of human panfuddling nectars.

Oh, would you quit glubbing swimming in the sea of denial, Kanaya? Okay. There were the human panfuddling nectars involved at Hiveapproaching and some things may have happened due to that.

But I'm not even talking about that, anyway. It's the rest of the time I'm glubbing about.

I am not in the sea of denial because there is little to be in denial about. Given the truism that there is nothing worth denying, your claim seems utterly nonsensical in retrospect.

But I will humor your claims nonetheless and ask you what, exactly, do you mean?

Four knitted scarves

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